I apologize for the length of this page, but
I felt that it was important to present all of the information to give a clear
picture of the situation. I have not included all the email that
he sent me, just the relevant ones.
Fri, 24 Apr 1998
First Contact:
I haven't left your web site. It's very entertaining for me. About your rants,
I would like to have a dialog with you, if you want. Here is a place to start...
(goes on and on about himself)
It would be nice to have a new non-work email acquaintance. I hope to hear
from you soon. Sincerely,
Burt Edwards
-----
My response:
Nothing, as it is my perogative whether to have a "dialog" with this
person or not.
-----
Wed, 29 Apr 1998
Another note from Burt:
I found the latest news update from your web site, last night during a class
break. But today, I can't seem to find how to get the latest news. Could you
take a minute, at your convenience, and tell me how to find your news update?
------
My Response:
You can find a link to the Latest News at:
http://www.baddgrrl.com
http://www.baddgrrl.com/BigScreen3.htm
------
Thu, 30 Apr 1998
Next contact from Burt:
I very much appreciate hearing from you. I think your web site is very interesting,
and look forward to reading it more. I am surprised how much I look forward
to finding out the latest news about you.
Here is a long shot ...
I will be in your area on the weekend after next.
I will arrive at Oakland at 0840 on Saturday, 5/9. I plan to visit with my
Aunt Evelyn, who I've never met, at 1500-1600 that day. She lives in Castro
Valley (and is 90 years old).
So I am leaving Sat AM open and wonder if we could have coffee or juice together
in the AM; or possibly lunch together if your schedule permits. My treat!
Thanks again for your email yesterday afternoon!!
Also, here are my phone numbers; please feel free to call me anytime as I have
answering machines on each. I am in and out of my office alot, as well as home.
So chances are you will miss me (50%), but I should get back in touch soon.
I hope you have a great day! Please let me know if there is any chance to meet
you (even very briefly) on Saturday, May 9th. It would be great to meet you
in person!!!
Burt
(619) ***-**** (w)
(619) ***-**** (h)
San Diego
------
My response:
Nothing. I am somewhat annoyed that a complete stranger with whom I've had
practically NO interaction, wants me to meet with him. But I've had other
strange requests from people on the Internet so I choose to ignore this one.
------
Thu, 30 Apr 1998
Next response from Burt:
How long will you be working this afternoon?
I still haven't found your latest news, so if you have 2 minutes, call me
to walk me through what I am missing.
Thanks,
Burt
619-***-****
San Diego
-----
My response:
Now I'm starting to get a little angry because I sent him the URL and the page
he is looking for is the FIRST item on my MAIN home page. I feel like
he is either really stupid and demanding or he is trying to manipulate me into
calling him. Who would ask someone to call them to "walk them through"
their web page? Would YOU do that?
But despite that, I send the following response:
http://www.baddgrrl.com/LatestNews.htm
------
Thu, 30 Apr 1998
Next response from Burt (after he FINALLY finds the Latest News page):
Could I call you for about three minutes before you leave? I would really
like to hear your voice. I know you leave at 7PM so hope you read this soon,
then send me your phone # (or just call me unless that is against your company
rules; for just a brief talk I promise.
BE/SD
------
Thu, 30 Apr 1998
Looking back now, this is probably the point where I should have said "Go
F*** yourself" but my response was:
I really don't have time to chat. I'm going to be working late tonight.
-------
Fri, 1 May 1998
I see that you are still at work, so here goes another long shot ...
I have an on-line photo from my Navy lab that I can send you (via URL). It
is not very good and I am middle aged rather than young, but anyway. (It's the
digital photo in the lab's badge system; taken about two months ago.)
Would you have time to look at it today, or would another time be better?
Thanks,
Burt
-------
My response:
Nothing, this guy obviously is an idiot.
-------
Sun, 3 May 1998
Now this is THE KICKER, I couldn't believe it when I first read it. I've
highlighted the "good" parts:
From: Burt Edwards
Subject: Call For Help
Dear Lorraine,
I am in need of assistance from you for next weekend. I know this is
very unusual to ask for help from someone that I know only throuh the internet.
Also, you may have your weekend plans already set.
Nevertheless, I feel a strong call in my heart that it is OK to ask you
for help, so here goes.
Would it be possible for you to meet me at the Oakland airport on Saturday
morning? My Southwest Airlines flight arrives at 8:40 AM, as I think I mentioned
before. (I don't have the fight number with me, but will send it to you later
this week.)
Why you say? I would like to pay you for your gasoline, and have you drive
me to a place in San Franciso on Saturday, before I go to my Aunt Evelyn's place
in Castro Valley at mid-afternoon. I would like you to drive me to Castro
Valley also.
By traveling together, we will have time for coffee/juice and later lunch too.
I want to introduce you to my aunt. She seems so bright and energetic for 90
years old. I am really looking forward to meeting her.
If we have time after we leave SF, we can go to an early movie before you
take me to Castro Valley. Movie, meals and everything else will be my treat.
I am in need of your driving skills and car to get around.
In San Francisco, I want to visit a 67 year old Chinese man who lives on Bush
Street. He has has been a friend to my sister Monica for over 20 years. I have
some ideas to discuss with him in person about improving the situation for Monica.
I want to see what kind of place he lives in, as it may be acceptable for my
sister to move to.
Basically, I have quite alot of personal business for Saturday and Sunday,
including a big challenge Sunday afternoon when I visit at Monica's Oakland
apartment. She and her boyfriend Louis have been having problems, so I need
to be very flexible on what to expect. I am praying that it will be a very peaceful
meeting.
Lorraine, if you can I hope you can assist me. Your help would be very
beneficial, as I don't know the SF/Oakland roads at all. I'm sure that I could
get by with a rental car and associated map, but it would not be near as easy
(or fun) as with you being there. The truth is that I really want to meet
and talk with you, and my weekend visit seems like one of the special "coincidences"
that seem to come from outside this world.
Last, if you can somehow free up your whole weekend,
then I would like to invite you to join me for dinner on Saturday evening with
Evelyn and her daughter Sandra. (I have never met her either, so this is a once
in lifetime experience coming up for me.)
Originally, Evelyn was planning for both Monica and me to visit. But I decided
to visit with Monica separately, after my visit with Evelyn is over on Sunday
afternooon. So Evelyn almost certainly has an extra bedroom that you
could use so you don't have to drive late after dinner. (I'll be a gentleman
and sleep in the living room!!) I'm sure that she would like to have you
join us for the dinner, etc. The next day I planned to go to Sunday Church with
Evelyn and Sandra. Please join us for this too if you can. After morning Church,
we will have a meal together at noon or shortly after. You are invited to this
as well.
After my visit with Monica at 3:00 to 4:00 PM, I need a ride back to the
Oakland airport. My plane departs at 9:00 PM.
During my two day visit, I will be busy as you can tell. I hope that you
can join me for some (preferrably most or even all) of the time. Meeting
my Aunt Evelyn for the first time is a special time for me. Meeting with
you is a *very* special experience, something that I am most excited about.
Lorraine, you can tell that I am really taking a chance to write this email.
Remember your life philosophy, live with passion. Well this letter is based
on how energized that I feel in my heart about meeting you in person, after
getting to know you initially through you web site and emails.
So I will be praying all the time, as I wait for your response.
Sincerely, Burt
------
I was absolutely furious!!!! $*%(@#!!!!!
Here is my response:
Why yes Burt, I have absolutely nothing better to do than to chauffeur a perfect
stranger around for two days around the Bay Area. Oh, better yet, why
don't I just GIVE you my car? And how about say, $1,000.00 spending money
to make your visit here a memorable one?
Would you like me to pay for your airfare too? Would that help? Should
I pay for all your meals also? Oh and your offer to sleep in the living
room is soooo chivalrous. You mean after all I get to do for you, I don't get
the priviledge of sleeping with you too?
This is the most presumptuous, insulting email I have ever received. I was
less offended by the men who wrote to me asking for nude photos of myself. At
least they did not presume that I was some stupid, gullible lackey sitting here
waiting to do their bidding.
Please do not ever, ever, EVER try to contact me in any way, shape or form
again. And please do not insult me by signing my Guestbook. You've
insulted me enough already.
-----
Mon, 4 May 1998
His response: (what response? I thought you asked him to never contact you
again?)
In hindsight, I'm sure my email was not very smart, to say the least. (I know,
you would say *very stupid*, and I cannot give you a logical reason to support
my email; it was strictly based on intuition, and I trust my intuition. So until
I read my email from you, at noon time, I was keeping my faith; I must admit
that I have never received such an impact type email as yours. I thank you for
putting the extra time in to let me know how badly you felt.) So I won't expect
any answer because you made your feelings very clear.
But if at sometime in the future you would like to start over on a possible
friendship, just let me know. I promise that I will be much more sensitive with
regard to your feelings. (I know that you are saying "No Fxxxxxx Way!" and I
understand.) But sometimes the future is hard to predict. I do not have any
bad feelings toward you and think you were very reasonable. Please don't hesitate
to contact me in a month or two, or a year or two, as you did make a very good
impression on me.
--------
My response:
Nothing, ok so he felt the need to apologize. Fine. I did not want to open
up any line of communication so I chose to ignore this.
-------
Tue, 5 May 1998
Then he sends another note with the Subject heading "Another Request".
HOW many requests has this man made of me already?? What part of
"do not ever, ever, EVER contact me again" did he not understand??!!
From: Burt Edwards
Subject: Another Request
Hi Lorraine,
I still feel very badly about the email I sent you Sunday. As I told you yesterday,
I realize it was very unfair to you, regarding my plans for next weekend.
My new request is ...
I ask you to forgive me for this mistake. I am very VERY sorry for what I emailed
you. I hate to have such a negative feeling between us, because in fact, my
intentions were to find a way to spend time with you, and to get to know you
in person. I really hope that you will consider my new request. I don't want
to leave things is such a negative state.
Again, I apologize and ask for your forgiveness.
------
My response:
Again nothing.
------
Thu, 7 May 1998
Then he sends me another email with just the subject header "Thinking
Of You". This guy has got to be one of the most manipulative people
I've ever met. By now I realize that this is all about him. I've
already told him how I feel and all he cares about is how HE feels. He
needs for me to forgive him. He needs me to contact him. This has nothing
to do with my feelings, only what HE NEEDS.
This guy obviously has NO respect for my feelings at all, otherwise he would
not continue to try to contact me after I explictly asked him not to.
My response, nothing again. I'm thinking, if he sends me one more
email I'm going to totally flame him. He will feel the wrath of BaddGrrl.
------
Fri, 8 May 1998
From: Burt Edwards
Subject: Coffee Invite, Sat 11:00 AM
Hi Lorraine,
I want to invite you to have a quick cup of coffee with me tomorrow morning.
I will have a rental car for the weekend, and can meet you at a convenient location
near your home. For 15 to 20 minutes, it would be a chance for me to meet
you in person, and to let you know that I will *never* try to combine my
time with you with my family visit oblications. I promise that in my time with
you, I will treat you as #1 as you deserve, and that you will have my *total*
focus. I want VERY badly to be your friend.
How to recognize me ...
I am a white male, 5"11', 185 lbs
I have brown hair, and blue grey eyes
I do not have a beard or mustach
My hair is not short, but trimmed reasonably I look to be around 40 (but I
am older)
I will be wearing kaiki casual pants, and a blue short sleeve shirt, with a
kaiki print on it. I look casual, rather that sophisiticated, like I am from
Texas or Okla., which I am. (probably explains Sunday's email)
I am a good, peace loving man, and if I have time with you, I really think
that I can help remove the negative feelings that developed last Sunday. And
I think that I could be your San Diego friend, so that when you come here we
can get together. Also, I have two cousins in addition to my sister and aunt;
so I may be visiting the Bay Area fairly regularly. When I do, it would be
fantastic to have a chance to treat you as #1.
Again, I would really like to meet you tomorrow. I may be at the place you
want somewhat early, but with the rental car, etc. situation, I want to allow
enough time to be on time.
If you can make it, it is best to leave a message at my home number; since
I plan to leave work at 2:30 this afternoon. I will check my email just before
I leave, but can't check email at home. Just tell me which freeway, exit, and
address. My home # is ***-***-****.
I hope that I can meet you tomorrow morning,
Burt
------
My response is right here on this page.
Burt, if you read this and I know you will... If you try to contact
me in person I swear, have absolutely no doubt in your mind
that I will kick the living SHIT out of you. If you try to find me or stalk
me, I will make you sorry you ever heard my name.
This is not a joke. I am not afraid of you nor am I worried about
my personal safety. Stay the hell away from me. Try anything and
your information has been posted on the World Wide Web for all the world to
see.
(I decided to take your phone number off, but I could always post
that up here.)
You have been warned.