1. Ghost shit--the kind where you feel the shit
come out but there is no
shit in the toilet.
2. Clean shit--the kind where you shit it out,
it in the toilet,
but there is nothing on the toilet paper.
3. Wet shit--the kind where you wipe your butt
times and it feels
unwiped so you have to put some toilet paper
between your butt and your
underwear so you don't ruin your pants with a
4. Second Wave--It happens when you're done
shitting and you've pulled
your pants up to your knees and you realize
have to shit some more.
5. Pop-a-vein-in-your-forehead shit--the kind
where you strain so much
you practically have a stroke.
6. Richard Simmons shit--you shit so much you
7. Lincoln Log shit--the kind that is so huge
you're afraid to flush
without breaking it into little pieces with
8. Gassy shit--It's noisy and everyone within
earshot is giggling.
9. Corn shit--self explanatory.
10. Gee-I-wish-I-could shit shit--the kind where
you want to shit, but
all you can do is sit on the toilet, cramp
fart a few times.
11. Spinal tap shit--that's when it hurts so bad
coming out, you'd swear
it was leaving you sideways.
12. Wet cheek shit--(the power dump!) the kind
comes out of your
butt so fast your cheeks get splashed with
13. Liquid shit--the kind where yellowish brown
liquid shoots out and
splatters all over the toilet bowl.
14. Mexican food shit--it smells so bad the room
must be condemned.
15. Upper class shit--the kind that thinks their
shit doesn't smell.
16. Fisherman's bobber shit--the kind where you
in a public restroom,
there are two people waiting on your stall,
shit and flush two
times, but several golf ball size pieces are
still floating at the
17. Ambush shit--the kind that never happens at
home, but usually at a
party or while playing golf. It is the
of trying to
fart--just a little, but you end up with
trouser chili and you walk
bow-legged for the rest of the day.
18. Drunken shit--the kind you have the morning
after a long night of
drinking. It's most noticeable trait is the
skid marks on the bottom
of the toilet.
19. Champagne Shit--you're so constipated that by
the time the cork blows,
a bubbly liquid streams from your ass.
20. Kling-On Shit--The kind where, when you go to
wipe it, it's there
waiting on the edge.
21. Blow Out Shit--The shit that's proceeded by a
fart so vicious, you
have to check the bowl afterwards to make
there are no cracks.
22. Exorcist Shit--The kind where
yellowish-brownish liquid shoots out of
your ass and burns your ass while it
all over the toilet.
(See Liquid Shit)
23. Peek-A-Boo Shit--It comes halfway out, then
goes back in, comes
back out, goes back in, etc.
24. Pregnancy Shit--The kind where you're really
backed up and it makes
you grunt and wheeze for a long while until
finally splits your
crack in a child bearing fashion.(See Pop a
Vein Shit, Spinal Tap Shit)
25. Rabbit Shit--It comes in cute, round
but there loads of it
about. Actually, you're never really
but stop at some.