Lesson number one
A crow was sitting on a tree, doing nothing all day.
A small rabbit saw the crow, and asked him, "Can I also sit like
you and do nothing all day long?" The crow answered: "Sure, why not."
So, the rabbit sat on the ground below the crow, and rested. All of a
sudden, a fox appeared, jumped on the rabbit and ate it.
Moral of the story: To be sitting and doing nothing, you must be sitting very,
very high.
Lesson number two
A turkey was chatting with a bull. "I would love to be able to
get to the top of that tree," sighed the turkey, "but I haven't
got the energy." "Well, why don't you nibble on some of my droppings?" replied
the bull. "They're packed with nutrients." The turkey pecked at a lump of
dung and found that it actually gave him enough strength to reach the
first branch of the tree. The next day, after eating some more
dung,he reached the second branch. Finally after a fourth night, there he was
proudly perched at the top of the tree. Soon he was promptly spotted by
a farmer, who shot the turkey out of the tree.
Moral of the story : Bullshit might get you to the top, but it won't keep you
there.
Lesson number three
When the body was first made, all the parts wanted to be Boss.
The brain said, " I should be Boss because I control the whole body's
responses and functions." The feet said, " We should be Boss as we carry
the brain about and get him to where he wants to go." The hands said,"
We should be the Boss because we do all the work and earn all the
money."And so it went on and on with the heart, the lungs and the eyes
until finally the asshole spoke up. All the parts laughed at the idea of the
asshole
being the Boss.So the asshole went on strike, blocked itself up and
refused to work.Within a short time the eyes became crossed, the hands clenched,
the feet twitched, the heart and lungs began to panic and the brain fevered.
Eventually they all decided that the asshole should be the Boss,
so the motion was passed.
Moral of the story : All the other parts did all the work while the
Boss just sat on his ass.
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